Dear Inclement Weather Teacher,
In Florida, we use the term “inclement weather,” to cover a host of unpredictable weather conditions. We can’t call it a snow day because we already know there won’t be snow. There never is, so the phrase inclement weather becomes more of a catch-all phrase for Floridians. It could mean a tornado is heading down Main Street, a hurricane is ripping through the coast, black ice is doing whatever black ice does, or a solar eclipse is eclipsing- don’t laugh…that actually happened once.
Regardless of the weather conditions, what teachers are most interested in is “the call out.” They brew by the phone with eager anticipation for "the call," then they stir in a little facebook drama to express indignation over the perilous driving conditions, and finally they drink from the cup of bitterness when neighboring counties make declarations of cancellation while they wait in limbo for the ultimate pardon: a day off in the middle of the week.
What’s it gonna be? Pajamas or dress pants? Netflix or morning announcements? A girl needs to know.
Yesterday, local teachers were 22 degrees of lucky with a Tuesday no school. Who knows maybe that stinkin’ groundhog was right all along. We were mad at him back in January, but yesterday he was everybody’s favorite, loveable mascot. I like to think he had a conversation with the universe.
Maybe yesterday’s surprise was the universe’s way of saying what the rest of the world has neglected to mention. Maybe, he way saying, “Hey there tired teacher, I see you. I know you’re at your wit’s end. How ‘bout a day off in the beautiful sunshine, and just for good measure, I’ll even allow you to keep your electricity?”
To that we say, “Thank you, Mr. Universe. As a sign of appreciation, we promise to recycle, refrain from littering, and warm up to the idea of paper straws.”
In return, we have a small favor to ask.
This may be pushing the envelope, but do you think you could throw in some forgiveness for the missed day of instruction?
-CDB